Jeremy Clarkson has a plan for the apocalypse because, of course, he does

| Deputy TV editor Published October 17, 2026 2:54pm Updated October 17, 2026 2:54pm Jeremy Clarkson has a plan for the apocalypse… and on that bombshell(Picture: SWNS/Corbis via Getty Images) We live in interesting times, which is a roundabout way of saying it kind of feels like the end of days. We’ve got the war in Ukraine in its fourth year, the whole El Niño thing, and whatever is going on with that plague outbreak in Russia. Is it any wonder then that some people have started putting together a plan for how they’d survive a disaster? And one such man is former motoring journalist turned tractor enthusiast, Jeremy Clarkson. The 66-year-old shone some light on his plans for Armageddon in his Sun column this week. Specifically, he was writing about former No. 10 speechwriter, Clare Foges, who said she’s followed the advice of Environment Secretary Dame Angela Eagle, who warned last month that people should start storing supplies in case of extreme weather events. No beans for Jeremy, please (Picture: Instagram @jeremyclarkson1) Apparently she’s got tinned food stocked up in her garden shed, something that left Jeremy a little incredulous. And in his usual boisterous style, Jeremy pointed out that if it really were the end of days and the four Horsemen of the Apocalypse came clip-clopping into town, a tin of beans probably isn’t going to save you. ‘What exactly does she think is going to happen when her neighbours, who didn’t prepare and are getting desperate, decide to help themselves to her supplies?’ he wrote. I’m with Jeremy on this (Picture: Corbis via Getty Images) Jeremy also pointed out that if the world really is ending, you should probably treat yourself to something a bit nicer than a can of chickpeas. So what’s Jezza’s big plan for the end of all things, if that day ever arrives? He’s going to the pub, of course. Smile, Jeremy, it’s not the end of the world! (Picture: David M. Benett/Dave Benett/Getty Images for Hawkstone) Specifically, his pub (or brewery — the queues at the Farmer’s Dog would probably be worse than a bank holiday during Ragnarök) ‘If things do get ugly,’ he wrote. ‘I won’t be in a shed with some seeds, nuts and probiotic supplements. ‘I will be in my brewery with a hamper from Fortnum’s and a big, daft grin on my face.’ Deals of the Day See London's Christmas lights from an open-top double-decker bus this winter My skin always suffers when the heating goes on but this serum changed that The skincare formula that finally took the guesswork out of my routine Families can save up to 20% on summer 2027 holidays in Club Med's four-day sale Cold mornings are coming and this is the dressing gown I want to live in Arrow MORE: Jeremy Clarkson: ‘Ranulph Fiennes should not be in a care home’ Arrow MORE: Jeremy Clarkson wants to open a new pub but it won’t be easy to get a table Arrow MORE: Jeremy Clarkson reveals bizarre reaction after confronting ‘frantic’ man performing sex act TV Newsletter Sign up and tell us which TV shows you love to watch to get personalised updates every morning.