I can’t stop cheating on my husband while he watches sports…he has no idea I’m arranging dates while sitting next to him

THERE is a break in play during the cricket match that Sam Miller’s husband, Mark, 39, is engrossed in. But rather than have a chat with his wife, who he has ignored every evening for the duration of the World Cup tournament and now the English cricket season, he grabs his phone and flicks through the endless sports chat on his WhatsApp ‘lads’ groups. Sam has had multiple affairs behind her husband’s back – and she has no plans of stopping Credit: Getty The 36-year-old Londoner finds men online for secret romps Credit: Getty Now Sam, 36, has discovered a ‘sport’ all of her own – as Mark collapses into the settee for an evening of pitch viewing, she opens an infidelity app on her phone and scrolls in the hope of finding a date or sex with a stranger. Here, the finance company administrator, from north London, reveals why she can’t stop cheating on her loyal husband of nine years – despite being racked with guilt about it. Sam says: “ANYONE who knows me, a shy and happily married woman, would be taken aback to hear of my secret chats and trysts with other men. But I am so fed up with the lack of connection that I urgently needed attention and cannot stop cheating. My story is not unusual; all over Britain, married ladies are clicking into extramarital dating websites to seek out affairs. An infidelity dating site recorded a massive surge in messages from lonely women during major fixtures like the World Cup, with many, like me, complaining their sports-mad partners have completely blanked them during the sunny months. Although I love Mark, a freelance PR, who I have been with since we met on a night out nine years ago, he has worked away for long stints of six weeks at a time, a few times a year. In June 2024, when he was on a six-week secondment abroad, I was feeling lonely and had an urgent need for some attention. A single female pal and I had been to a pub, and after becoming a little tipsy, we started flirting with some strangers, just dancing and enjoying their compliments. But this lit a spark in me, and when I arrived home that night, a little worse for wear, I searched online for terms like “looking for an affair” or “discreet affair.” A couple of options came up, like Victoria Milan and Ashley Madison, but I clicked on IllicitEncounters.com. Straight away I started speaking to a man on the app, but I felt so guilty. The next morning I just tried to forget about it. I had never even considered talking to another man; I was so devoted to Mark, but something in me needed closeness. But after a few days, there was no denying I was craving attention and, pushing guilt to the back of my mind, I logged back on, and the same guy had left a message saying he hoped we could meet. I had such an urge for attention that I met him. After a few great dates filled with laughter in hotel bars, we shared a steamy kiss and ended up booking a room and having mind-blowing sex in the hotel. Rather than guilt, the overriding feeling was happiness, like an itch had been scratched. I was loving leading a double life, and was completely normal when chatting to Mark on the phone; the affair lasted for three weeks. Then when my husband was on his way back from the work trip, the guilt hit like a tonne of bricks, so I deleted the app and didn’t even consider admitting it to Mark. Weirdly, I felt like my affair made me closer to my husband as I realised I loved him too much to jeopardise things. Then this summer, everything changed. When the World Cup started, Sam and Mark’s once-a-week sex life became non-existent Credit: Getty All over Britain, married ladies are clicking into extramarital dating websites to seek out affairs Credit: Getty It was just one day into the World Cup’s evening-long football on telly that I realised how much time Mark would be spending engrossed in the TV. He is a considerate man. Usually we have our evening meal together, but as the games started at 6pm, he didn’t even consider enjoying dinner with me. Instead, he grabbed a bag of Doritos, two cans of lager and settled himself in front of the box. As I picked at a salad at the table in our small studio flat, the football boomed, and he was simply absent for the duration of the evening. As the days went on, it wasn’t just the evenings of silence while he watched the games that made me sad. He had become a different person by abandoning all of the household tasks we usually shared- his socks would be chucked in the direction of the bin, and his empty lager glasses littered the kitchen sides. I realised that if he was going to ignore me, I could get attention from someone else. I hadn’t deleted my Illicit Encounters account, so in anger I logged back in. In my inbox were a few messages from men, new to me, interested before I closed the account and when I replied to them, messages started coming through. A handsome 30-something caught my eye straight away. Ade and I got chatting while I sat on the sofa opposite my ignorant husband, as the white noise of the TV blared in the background. Over two days, the chats started getting more intimate as he stated he wanted to meet in real life straight away. The edge of guilt started forming in my mind, but we planned a drink in a cocktail bar. Walking into the dim room, I saw Ade instantly, and was pleased that he was as handsome in the flesh. He kissed me on the cheek, and I was excited to be the centre of his full attention, but sadly he wasn’t my type at all. However, the taste of that forbidden fruit left me looking for more intimacy, so I started chatting on the app to Darren*- and by date two we ended up in his bed. Being the focus of his lust made me feel entirely happy, and I did not have a jot of guilt, as I deserve to be wanted. I know exactly how Mark would feel if he discovered this: extremely shocked. I don’t think he believes I could cheat, and that’s why I can get away with it. Bizarrely, I know if I discover Mark was cheating I would be utterly shocked, and I think I might even leave him. I know this is a double standard. We have our flat together and are discussing if kids are in our future, and in my heart I think if we had children these affairs would stop. But I have needs and since the start of the World Cup mine and Mark’s once-a-week sex life had been non-existent. I know my husband discovering this could shatter the cosy relationship we have grown, but it’s an urge, and if Darren and I don’t work out, I’ll be back on the app to find a new partner.” Names have been changed