110 Thanksgiving Jokes That Are Surprisingly Easy to Digest

Studies show that 10 to 15 minutes of laughing can burn up to 40 calories. On Thanksgiving, after a spread filled with golden-brown turkey, creamy mashed potatoes, and unlimited pumpkin pie, you’ll definitely want to double that dose and pass it down the table.While you can usually count on your zany uncle to supply a few unexpected chuckles midway through the meal, why leave your holiday humor to chance? Prepping a few Thanksgiving jokes alongside your stuffing is the best defense against a dead-silent dinner table. After all, who doesn’t love a bit of playful holiday humor between passes of the platter?Why did the turkey pass on the pumpkin pie? He was stuffed.What happens when potatoes drink too much? They get mashed.If either of those carved out a smile, you’re in for a real feast! Whether you’re looking to break an awkward silence before politics come up or simply want to entertain the kids' table, here are more than 100 hilarious Thanksgiving jokes, puns, and dad jokes guaranteed to give your core a workout. Funny Thanksgiving JokesLexington Herald-Leader/GettyImages1. Who delivers the best Thanksgiving sides?Yam-azon.2. Why do so many people eat potatoes on Thanksgiving?Because they’ve got a-peel.3. What do you call a wisecracking Butterball?A fresh turkey.4. What did one pumpkin pie say to the other?“You wanna piece of me?”5. In what state did the pilgrims arrive?Exhaustion.6. What do you call a sad cranberry?A blueberry.7. What do you get when you cross a Thanksgiving centerpiece with a trumpet?A horn-ucopia.8. How do potatoes cross the sea?On gravy boats.9. What smells the best at a Thanksgiving dinner?Your nose.10. Why did the Brussels sprout cross the street?It spotted a fork in the distance.11. What did the butter say when it won the race?“I’m on a roll!”12. What do sweet potatoes wear to bed?Yammies.13. What did the gravy say when it got promoted at work?"I’m moving up in the food chain!”14. Why did the roll go to the doctor?It was feeling crummy.15. What’s the difference between a Thanksgiving turkey and a bad joke?One gets dressed, and the other gets roasted.16. What did the shocked pumpkin say to the squash?“Oh my gourd!”17. What do you call a male turkey's idea of a practical joke?Tomfoolery.18. What happens when potatoes drink too much?They get mashed.19. Who can be both naked and dressed at the same time?A turkey.Thanksgiving Turkey JokesLexington Herald-Leader/GettyImages20. What do you call a track-star turkey?Fast food.21. What’s a turkey’s favorite dessert?Apple gobbler.22. What does a turkey say to a search engine?Google, google, google!23. Why did the turkey bring a microphone to the dinner table?He wanted to host a roast.24. What’s the best way to stuff a turkey?Serve him lots of mac and cheese and pie.25. Where do you find a turkey with no legs?Exactly where you left it.26. Why did the turkey get sent to the dean's office?He used fowl language.27. What kind of turkey is always running late?A slow-cooked one.28. What do you get when you cross a turkey with a ghost?A poultry-geist.29. Why did the turkey get bumped to first class on his flight?He was a frequent flyer.30. What did one turkey say to the other turkey at the pub?"Let’s get basted.”31. What do you call a turkey the day after Thanksgiving?A lucky duck. 32. Why did the turkey pass on the pumpkin pie?He was stuffed. 33. What did the Thanksgiving turkey say to the Christmas ham?Nice to meat you.34. What do turkeys give thanks for on Thanksgiving?Vegans. 35. Did you hear about the turkey who lost his left wing?He’s all right now.36. What type of key has legs and can’t open doors?A tur-key. 37. Why did the turkey get kicked out of family game night?He was accused of fowl play.38. Why did the turkey cross the road?To prove it wasn't chicken.39. What’s the best song to play while cooking a turkey?"All About That Baste.”40. What’s the most musical part of a turkey?The drumstick. 41. How did the turkey get home in time for Thanksgiving?He took the gravy train.42. What's a turkey's favorite part of a golf game?The birdie.43. What do turkeys use to serve wine?A gob-let.44. What champagne do male turkeys like to drink?Tom Perignon.45. What does a turkey with a bum leg say?“Wobble, wobble.”46. Why don’t turkeys fly on airplanes?They prefer to wing it. 47. Did you hear about the turkey dance?It was a Butterball.48. Why did the Butterball stay in the freezer until Thanksgiving morning?He wanted to keep a cool head under pressure.49. What do you call a turkey who never has your back?A fair-feather friend.50. Did you hear about the turkey who had a fever?He had a temperature of 350.51. What do you call a badly behaved Thanksgiving bird?A grounded turkey.52. What do you call a turkey on Friday morning?A sandwich. 53. Where does a turkey do its holiday shopping?The HoneyBaked Ham shop.54. What do you call a turkey who’s bad at bowling?A gutterball.55. What was the turkey looking for at the toy store?Gobbleheads.56. What does a turkey use to tell the future?A crystal butterball.57. Which side of the turkey has the most feathers?The outside.58. Where does a turkey go on vacation in November?Turkey.59. What do turkeys have in common with the White House?They both have wings.60. What do you call a bunch of turkeys rocking out?A Wood-flock.Pilgrim JokesLexington Herald-Leader/GettyImages61. Why did the Pilgrim go to the pool?To get a puri-tan.62. What kind of music did the Pilgrims listen to on the Mayflower?Plymouth Rock.63. Why did the Pilgrims cross the Atlantic?To get to the other side.64. What did the Pilgrims use to bake Thanksgiving desserts?May-flour.65. What was the Pilgrim's favorite subject in school?His-story.66. Why did the Pilgrim love gardening?He was good at planting roots.67. What's a Pilgrim's favorite dance?The Turkey Trot.68. What event was held on the Mayflower the day after Thanksgiving?A Black Friday sail.69. How do Pilgrims break a bad habit?They stop cold turkey.70. What do pilgrims learn in school?Pilgrammar.71. Why don’t Pilgrims tell secrets in the cornfield?There are too many ears around.72. Why don’t Pilgrims sue?Because they like to settle.73. Where do Pilgrims learn to surf?Boarding school. 74. What did the Pilgrim wear to Thanksgiving dinner? A har-vest. 75. Why are Pilgrim libraries so tall?They have many stories.76. Why do Pilgrims’ pants keep falling down?Because they wear their belt buckles on their hats.77. What's a Pilgrim's favorite flower?Mayflower. 78. What is a Pilgrim's favorite type of sweet?Plymouth Rock candy.79. If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?Pilgrims.80. What made the Pilgrims on the Mayflower high?Sea weed. 81. What do you call a pretty Pilgrim?A Puri-ten.Thanksgiving Food Jokes and PunsLexington Herald-Leader/GettyImages82. Why did the stuffing cross the road?To get to the other sides.83. What do you get when you drop a pumpkin?Squash. 84. Why did the cranberry blush?It saw the turkey dressing.85. Which movie character makes the worst mashed potatoes?Forest Lump.86. Which food can you expect to be a troublemaker at the Thanksgiving table?The deviled eggs.87. Why was the Thanksgiving soup so expensive?It had 24 carrots.88. Why didn’t the chef season the turkey?She ran out of thyme.89. Where do chemistry majors sit on Thanksgiving?At the periodic table.90. What do you call a handsome yam?A hot potato.91. What did the baker say to the pumpkin?"I only have pies for you.”92. What did the salt say to the pepper on Thanksgiving?"Season’s greetings!”93. Why did the dinner roll get promoted?It really rose to the occasion.94. What do you call a potato on Thanksgiving break?A couch potato.95. What did the gravy say to the mashed potatoes?"I've got you covered."Thanksgiving Pumpkin and Pie JokesLexington Herald-Leader/GettyImages96. Why did the apple pie cry?It got its peelings hurt.97. What is a pumpkin’s favorite sport?Squash. 98. How many bakers does it take to make a pie?3.14.99. What is the quietest dessert?Key Mime Pie.100. What do math teachers eat on Thanksgiving?Pumpkin pi.101. What famous poet and playwright was known for his yummy pies?Bakespeare.102. What do wrestlers have for dessert?Grapple pie.103. What does pumpkin pie say in a fight?"You want a piece of me?"104. Why did the pumpkin pie go to the dentist?It needed a filling. Thanksgiving Knock-Knock JokesLexington Herald-Leader/GettyImages105. Knock, knock! Who's there? Taylor.Taylor who? Taylor to pass the yams!106. Knock, knock! Who's there? Norma Lee.Norma Lee who? Norma Lee I don't eat this much.107. Knock, knock! Who's there? Harry.Harry who? Harry up and pass those sides—I'm starved!108. Knock, knock! Who's there? Arthur.Arthur who? Arthur any more cranberries?109. Knock, knock! Who's there? Anita.Anita who? Anita bigger pair of pants after all that food!110. Knock, knock! Who's there? Tanks.Tanks who? Tanksgiving is here!Read More: