Quit the political mudslinging

At this juncture, I'm pretty over hearing how rubbish people are. You could give me a whole week of public holidays, and it still won’t be enough to get over the exhaustion of this election. I’m not on any ballot or anything. It’s a strange sensation to admit that I’m tired of this election long before it starts. In a few years, we’ll open a bubblegum fact wrapper that will read, “Did you know: South African political parties governed the country in a national alliance but also spent an entire campaign cycle besmirching one another. LIVE interactive map, latest news, multimedia and more! View Map The documentary broadcast teaser couldn’t be more compelling: “Just when you thought that the tripartite alliance was the most resentful alliance ever to come from politics – The GNU is here” For who? I get it, you all say that the other is a variation of the previous combination a party or their members were accused of: corrupt, rude, disconnected, elitist, or undercover pet perverts who want a list of where all the sexy animals are and want the people to pay for its drafting. Why do you have to hate one another? At this juncture, I’m pretty over hearing how rubbish people are. As much of a goss-gurl that anybody may be, spending a full night at a bar listening to how much they’re supposed to hate somebody else isn’t that appealing and would make most want to go home. Similarly, as fun as it may be for parties to keep pushing how evil the next guy is down our throats, it’s an off-putting way to engage in the election. The question must be asked: why do you have to hate one another? You have to work together on so many councils. Isn’t it awkward to sit opposite somebody you’ve just told the electorate is untrustworthy and then, uhhh, trust them to work with lest you lose your coalition benefits? Wouldn’t the political arena be easier and more pleasant for the electorate to navigate if one argued on things like ideas or delivery? There will always be space for disparagement and genuine concern that somebody who was on the cusp of going to jail is now running the finances of XYZ-Something-Mandela-y government institution. Should that be the bulk of an election campaign? That’s not for me to say. That was the whole idea of political freedom. I can’t tell anybody how to campaign. What I can do is tell everybody running those campaigns that it’s exhausting. I’m tired of hearing how poor our political class is, and I assure you, the message has been received by now, over and over. The results of the message may not be what you want, but we’ve heard you now. Could you perhaps turn your focus onto how I could get running water again? I’m really sure Thabo, Steve, and Tristan are awful and shouldn’t be in state office. Thanks for telling us, telling us again and again once more. I don’t see how that makes you any better, but certainly don’t see how acknowledging any of that makes Melville any more likely to have running water consistently. Pre-teen playground politics It’s been fun playing pre-teen playground politics, but now that the playground is a museum of rusted equipment, littered with used needles and beer cans, and strange people are lurking around, I’d prefer that we went inside and found anybody who will make the playground pleasant to play in again. Talking smack about anybody isn’t that great when we’re surrounded by your failings. There’s a great Latin term, mea culpa. In the language of the kids today, it translates to my bad…and of the kids of yesterday, my mistake. Here’s an idea: when you get accused of something, address it, even if it’s a mea culpa. Then proceed to show us where you’ve gotten things right and how you’d like to replicate that with more power in more areas. If you don’t have much to show us, then perhaps it’s understandable why you’d prefer to invest in mudslinging. Only now that everybody is doing it, the underlying motives are always going to be suspect and disingenuity nearly guaranteed. If the IEC could declare a week of campaigning where no party is allowed to mention any other party but themselves, that would be amazing and seriously less exhausting. It would also be quite telling because I’m not sure many will have much left to say.