My Boss Is Hiding a Huge Secret. I’m Scared to Tell HR.

Good Job Photo illustration by Slate. Photo by Sasun Bughdaryan/Getty Images Plus. Good Job is Slate’s advice column on work. Have a workplace problem big or small? Send it to Laura Helmuth and Doree Shafrir here. (It’s anonymous!) Dear Good Job, I work in a small office, that has experienced huge turnover in the past five years, including some recent high-level firings. Morale is low and tensions have been high for years now, despite the executive director being a very “nice” person. I think I finally know one reason why—but I am scared to tell HR. The executive director is hiding that they cannot type! I think they can type with only one or two fingers at a time, with lots of typos. They think all emails are “urgent” communication, rarely send them, and have said they prefer not to receive them at all. Their slides for public presentations are often years out of date. They will randomly call staff, even when that person is in a meeting or on PTO, for things that are not urgent or emergencies. They never check people’s calendars and often fail to schedule internal meetings. There’s an impulsivity about them, and a sense that if they don’t do something immediately, they might forget entirely. The catch is that we are primarily a work-from-home organization since 2020, and that is not going to change. The executive director took this job just before 2020, so I think they assumed it would be quite different, but they have not adapted, and would prefer everyone just do things “how they used to be” in the “old days” when things were primarily in person. Even when 2020 hit and the organization went remote, the executive director did not learn to type. They spend most of their time in meetings, and they delegate out anything they can that is written or requires good focus. While all of their work seems to get done, I am honestly not sure how much of it is ever written by them. I realized that these issues would line up with someone later in their career hiding a learning disability like dyslexia or even ADHD. I know that voice-to-text devices for the computer exist, like most phones have now, but the executive director does not use one. If they continue to refuse to ask for accommodations or adapt to modern, remote work best practices, and are allowed to continue like this, I’m concerned about the future stability of the organization! It could be a few years before they retire, and I am worried about how many staff will still be here for that transition. There just does not seem to be an appropriate way to raise these issues with the executive director or with HR without being fired, given the current culture. I’m not even sure if the executive director is even capable of change. Is the only option to wait it out until they retire, or leave? —Dream Job Turned Nightmare Dear Dream Job, From your letter, I can tell that you’re a compassionate person who is really devoted to their job and wants to make it better for everyone—and that you have probably identified the issue with morale and people leaving. I say probably because you don’t actually know why turnover has been high. It could be because of the executive director, or it could be for myriad other reasons that don’t have to do with them. But let’s say, for the sake of argument, that the ED’s issues are what’s leading people to leave and is a big contributor to the organization’s low morale. I think that you can raise this with HR and the board, but you need to be really careful to avoid diagnosing the ED with dyslexia, ADHD or anything else. You need to frame it as an issue that’s affecting workplace productivity, and bring specific examples of when that has occurred. I would also find out if the ED’s issues are really affecting other people—you’ll have more of a case if you can present this as a wider problem, not just something affecting you. I know you’re nervous about raising these issues, but I also think it’s worth thinking about what happens if you do raise them—and nothing happens. Are you willing to stay, given everything you know about how the organization is run? That’s a decision that only you can make. Good luck, and I do hope this gets resolved in a way that makes your workplace run a little more smoothly. —Doree Classic Prudie My childhood best friend, “John,” moved in with me (“Nick,” he/him) and my girlfriend, “Meg,” after getting evicted. We were always close before, but living with him has been a whole new experience. He’s very touchy-feely, constantly finding reasons to grab my hand or lean on me. When we’re playing a game or watching something, he and I end up cuddling on the couch, too. The weird thing is, I can’t say I mind it. Never miss new Slate Advice columns Get the latest from Prudie and our columnists in your inbox each weekday, plus special bonus letters on Saturdays. Advice Workplace Jobs