Man concerned over his children’s welfare gets protection order against wife

A man who said he is very concerned for the welfare of his young children, especially his five-year-old daughter, has been given a protection order against his wife.They still live together but are in the process of separating after their relationship had deteriorated, the man told Judge Andrew Gubbins at the emergency domestic violence court in Dolphin House, Dublin.The man said his wife had gone “off the rails” and is making their daughter “part of the separation”, which is causing the child a lot of emotional trauma, distress and confusion. She had dragged their daughter upstairs by the hair and locked her in her room on one occasion and he came home from work to find the child screaming, “in absolute tears”, and begging to get out, he said.His wife has also placed listening devices around the house and he is unable to have private calls with his solicitor, he said.READ MOREHis wife’s behaviour was not caused by any action of his but it had negatively affected his family, including his parents, he said.He is not concerned for his own safety but believes a protection order is “imperative” for the children’s health and wellbeing. Becoming upset, he said his young daughter had broken down in front of him on several occasions.Saying he was satisfied the man’s concerns for the children’s welfare are valid, the judge made the order.In another application, a woman got a protection order against her ex-partner after alleging he was physically and verbally abusive to her, including threatening “to come after me with baseball bats” if she did not come home when he said. “I know, once he gets this, he will just go crazy and start threatening me”, the woman said. Gubbins told her any breach of the order is a criminal offence and she should immediately contact gardaí if that occurred.When the woman, who has a disability, became distressed, her mother, who accompanied her to court on Friday, moved to comfort her, saying: “It’s over now.” “It’s not over, it’s only starting,” the woman replied.In evidence earlier, she said she was in a relationship with the man until recently when she left their shared home. During their relationship, he was physically and verbally abusive towards her, including an incident late last year when he punched her in the face and another when he pulled her by the hair. He called her names and phoned her when she was out, screaming at her, asking where she was, and threatening to hit her and come after her “with baseball bats” if she did not return at his stipulated time, she said. He showed up in different places, screaming and shouting and harassing her, she said.In another ex parte (one side only represented) application, a mother sought a protection order against her son, aged in his 20s, currently detained involuntarily in a psychiatric hospital.Her son has a diagnosis of a serious psychiatric illness but refused to take his medication for more than a year and his mental condition slowly deteriorated, she said. He had displayed increased verbal aggression and broke items like plates and cups “when he did not get his way”. Gardaí were called to their home after he physically assaulted her, leading to his current detention under the Mental Health Act, the court heard.“When he is sick, he does not know what he is doing,” the woman said. Her application was made with the support of her son’s mental health team for reasons including their concern her safety could not be ensured on his discharge, the judge was told. He was obliged to take his medication while in hospital but had said he would cease doing so on discharge. In another application, a distressed woman who said her husband has been verbally and physically abusive towards her got a protection order. “I just want love from him,” she said. She wants their marriage “to work out”, is prepared to go for counselling and just wants him to acknowledge when he is wrong, she said. In a recent incident, she felt ill while making his breakfast and he failed to act on her request to get medicine for her, telling her to get it herself and it was “his house”. He grabbed her neck during that argument, she said. In an earlier incident, he kicked her in the stomach, she said. He has called her abusive names including “bitch” and “slut” and accused her of being a “gold digger”. “I don’t know what gold he has,” she said. The judge said he would grant a protection order based on her information that her husband had assaulted her and an apparent “element of coercive control” by the man in threatening her work permit.The woman then asked would the protection order “lead to a divorce”, adding her husband has said he will divorce her. “That is outside my control, or your control,” the judge replied.