I’m sick of over-the-top first day of school photos

They are becoming more independent, and their world is getting bigger (Picture: Sally Anscombe/Getty Images) It’s the beginning of September and obligatory first day of school photos are starting to fill my social media feed. It’s the same every year – and has been pretty much since Facebook began back in the late 00s – a parent takes a photo of their kid standing outside of their front door, in their oversized uniform, their shiny new shoes, and a big toothy grin on their face. It used to be a cute tradition. But now, it’s become so gauche that it’s almost enough to make me delete my socials for a week. There’s a new trend where the photo is now accompanied by balloons – some children even have a whole arch – special breakfasts, cakes and personalised signs. It shows every last detail about their child: name, school, class, favourite colour and presumably their mother’s maiden name, probably doing some hackers a favour there. And as if buying school uniforms and equipment aren’t expensive enough, some parents also give their kids presents, which are on show and also photographed. The photo is now accompanied by balloons, special breakfasts, cakes and personalised signs (Picture: Sally Anscombe/Getty Images) It feels competitive and a crude display of wealth. I don’t know when I blinked and the first day of school became such a big deal. When I started primary in the 80s, I’m not sure anyone even took a photo of me in front of the front door. There were certainly no balloons, cake or personalised first-day decorations. Nor were grandparents, aunties and uncles assembling at the school gates as though a minor royal were about to arrive – something I’ve recently witnessed with my own eyes. I know I might sound like the fun police, but I do understand why the first day of school is such a huge deal. It feels competitive and a crude display of wealth (Picture: Ekaterina Demidova/Getty Images) I felt huge pangs of sadness when both my children started school, even more so when my youngest, Leo, started. I was bereft – it was another one of those ‘lasts’ that you’ll never get back. For me, it felt like a grieving process, which sounds slightly dramatic, but the whole dynamic of family life changes when your child starts school. Suddenly, that little person who has been around you for most of their life is spending a huge part of their day somewhere else. They are becoming more independent, and their world is getting bigger. I understand that it becomes emotional and why a parent wants to take a photograph – I have myself, but it feels like it’s become a competition on how much we make a display of it. What is your opinion on the growing trend of first-day-of-school celebrations? I think it's a wonderful way to celebrate the milestone.Check I feel it has become too excessive and competitive.Check I believe some moderation is needed, but it's okay to make it special.Check I don't really have strong feelings about this topic.Check Sign up to Metro's Puzzles Newsletter and get your favourite puzzles sent directly to you every day! Social media has a lot to answer for when it comes to the way we mark our children’s milestones. It feels like one family does something to celebrate their child, then another does it bigger, and before long something that was supposed to be a lovely little tradition becomes an expensive expectation. It reminds me of what has happened with birthday parties and, increasingly, World Book Day. The harsh truth is that, without social media, kids would only be having a photo, at most. And for some children, that’s all they get. This should be fun and exciting for children, but it’s become about the parents. If it wasn’t, it wouldn’t be next to a freshly cleaned front door with new flowers in a pot, with balloons and cake. Of course, there is absolutely nothing wrong with celebrating your child (Picture: Phil Adams) Children notice these moments – and inequality can become painfully obvious. The clothes they wear, trainers they have, holidays they go on, parties they’re invited to – it all becomes clear to them, and everyone around them, what their family can afford. It isn’t just about the first day of school. A ‘well done’ and ‘we’re so proud of you’ used to be enough, but now they get gifts for starting and finishing the school year and a good report. Some even get money for exam results and a starring role on your parents’ social media, where they proudly show their elaborate gifts off. Of course, there is absolutely nothing wrong with celebrating your child. I love celebrating my children, but there is a difference between making a memory and creating an expectation. Any child who is already feeling anxious and worried about heading to school, a huge fuss can actually make them feel worse. Sometimes less is more. We are also not considering the safety of our children in this attempt to show off. I know parents want that first-day photograph, but when your child is pictured in their school uniform, with the school logo visible, your door number on show, or outside the school itself, we are giving a lot away. Children don’t need balloons to know that starting school is special (Picture: Camille Wesser/Getty) There are too many risks of sharing children online, and I understand the temptation – I have previously shared my own online, but now, with the rise in AI and cybercrime, a few likes isn’t worth giving strangers that much information. We need to be more cautious. Anyway, children don’t need balloons to know that starting school is special and they don’t need a cake to know that you’re proud. And they certainly don’t need their entire family at the school gates to know they are loved. The first day of school is already a huge milestone; have a cuddle, tell them you are proud, and then let them go through those school gates and start their next chapter. Without the pressure to make it bigger, better or more Instagrammable than everyone else’s. Do you have a story you’d like to share? Get in touch by emailing Ross.Mccafferty@metro.co.uk. Share your views in the comments below. Arrow MORE: Argos has unveiled its children’s toys for Christmas 2026 — and it’s a nostalgia fest Arrow MORE: The Reading Festival crowd was dead – I blame the teenagers Arrow MORE: A letter to my young Black self about Afro hair Puzzles Newsletter Get your favourite puzzles when they are ready to play on the website sent directly to you every day and track your daily streak!