I was left alone with my friend's husband... what he did next shocked me. I tried to forget about it but then I received this mortifying message. Read DEAR CAROLINE's surprising response to an appalling situation

Updated: 12:21 EDT, 16 July 2026 Q Some friends we thought we knew well invited us to stay at their villa, and for the most part we had a lovely week. However, I’d never spent time alone with the husband before. One afternoon, while our spouses went out to buy wine, we stayed behind to cook. To my surprise, he became intensely flirtatious, stopping just short of making a pass at me. I was shocked. He later flirted with me in front of his wife, and I tried to laugh it off. When we got home, a mutual friend told me his wife had complained I’d spent the whole week flirting with her husband. I’m mortified. Should I tell her how her husband actually behaved towards me?A It must have been difficult to be put in this position by her husband. I am, of course, accepting your version of events, and that you didn’t flirt in anything other than a light-hearted way. (Many people flirt harmlessly, but warmth and friendliness can sometimes be mistaken for interest.) However, no, I wouldn’t advise telling the wife what really happened. She would probably not believe you because she doesn’t want to hear the truth. It is easier for her to blame you than admit that her husband might be propositioning her friends behind her back. As you haven’t mentioned your own husband, I assume he wasn’t concerned. If you haven’t told him what happened, though, it might be wise to do so in case incorrect rumours reach him from another source. To my surprise, my friend's husband became intensely flirtatious, stopping just short of making a pass at me. I was shocked. He later flirted with me in front of his wife, and I tried to laugh it off, writes a reader (picture posed by models)My family won't accept my 'angel' lodger Q My wife of over 60 years died after a three-year illness nine months ago. I’ve had lots of advice from bereavement professionals about coping, but as I’ve said to family and friends, there is no worse feeling than coming home to an empty house with nobody to talk to. After six months, I advertised for a lodger who could help with cooking and provide company in the evenings. After several interviews, including four men, this ‘angel’ arrived from Jamaica. She provides companionship and practical help and has made life bearable again. My family and friends think it’s far too soon to have someone else in my life. I’ve written explaining that nothing will ever take away the grief I feel for my wife, but nobody has replied. Today I cried most of the day over flowers my wife planted, which now look splendid. How can I get them to accept my lodger?A Your grief must be immense – and crying over flowers your wife planted says more than words ever could about how much you still miss her. I agree with the bereavement professionals you have spoken to that there is nothing disloyal about seeking company after the death of a spouse. What your family may not appreciate is that companionship does not mean replacing your wife. In fact, those who enjoyed the happiest marriages often struggle most with loneliness afterwards. Your children, grandchildren and friends are grieving too, but differently. Your children may simply be struggling with the painful reality of seeing another woman in the house their mother once shared with you. I also wonder whether their concerns are partly about your welfare. Your lodger sounds lovely, and I sincerely hope she is exactly as she appears. However, lonely and bereaved older people can sometimes be targeted by those seeking financial gain. Has she been open about her background and circumstances? Have references been checked? Does she contribute financially, as agreed? Has she ever shown an unusual interest in your money, property or will? Contact the Age UK helpline for advice on 0800 678 1602. If your lodger is genuine, she won’t be offended by you checking the facts. Instead of trying to persuade your family that you are right, invite them to tell you honestly what worries them and be willing to listen without becoming defensive. They may simply need to see that she treats you well, respects your wife’s memory and brings comfort rather than harm. Nobody can replace your wife of 60 years. But no one should have to endure overwhelming loneliness either.