I stopped giving my kids presents. Now I’m paying into their pensions instead

As a mother of five children, I dread the autumn as this is when the majority of our family birthdays fall followed by an expensive Christmas. It seems that in the space of three months more Amazon, Space NK and Boots packages arrive on our doorstep than is comfortable – and of course it’s all nose-bleedingly expensive. Having three teenagers is, as any parent will testify, very expensive. If they don’t “need” the latest jeans, it’s the skincare products or new shoes – so many shoes! As for the younger children, it’s the toys. We could not fit any more into our playroom and own enough hobby horses and remote control cars to entertain a whole primary school. We are at maximum capacity – we can’t fit another single item into our house. When my husband was once again lamenting the fact that he couldn’t find a pair of scissors in our messy abode I had a lightbulb moment of clarity. The night before all four of our younger children had piped up saying they wanted to join their brother and go to university. I looked over at Charlie, my husband, whose eyebrows were practically touching the ceiling, and sighed. It seems that we must plan ahead – and further ahead than you think. Thanks to Sir Keir Starmer raising employer’s national insurance contributions, it is harder than ever for companies to hire students: the casual student job has practically disappeared into thin air. Once they leave university they will have to repay their student loans, pay rent and get a job – if they can find one, that is. And, when will they ever be able to buy a house? The average age of a first-time buyer in 2026 is now 34, whereas in the mid-90s it was 29, according to Skipton Group’s annual home affordability index. Charlotte Harrison, CEO of Home Finance at Skipton Building Society, says: “Our research found that the under-25 first-time buyer market has all but disappeared. In the mid-90s, almost one in four first-time buyer purchases were made by people under 25.” Today, it is fewer than one in 10. This financial rude awakening meant one thing for us – we needed to cut back on spending on presents and instead start saving for our children’s future. We tend to spend around £500 per year on our children’s birthday and Christmas presents combined. This year we are planning to put a large sum into a junior pension and get the saving ball rolling. Why a pension rather than a lump sum for university or a house? The Government are canny, you don’t get anywhere near the same tax relief for either of the latter two. And, we figured that with the financial pressures our children will face throughout their lives, saving for a pension will be the last priority for them. But there are rules around children’s pensions that are not for the faint-hearted: children won’t be able to get their hands on the money until they are 57 years old. For my eldest son, this is in 37 years’ time. For my youngest, it is 50 years’ time. Is this a good idea? I think so. This way they can see the effect of decades-long compounding – look at it like an upper safety net for later in life when they want to pay off their mortgage or take a holiday of a lifetime. Sybilla with her husband Charlie and five children (Photo: Sybilla Hart) The children were less than amused when I told them about these draconian plans. When I explained the rationale they could see the point, but naturally they still wanted that skirt or T-shirt for their birthday. We aren’t the only ones taking these sorts of drastic measures. Helen Morrissey, head of retirement analysis at Hargreaves Lansdown, says: “Our data is showing us that more people are opening junior SIPPs (self-invested personal pension). Account openings are up 153 per cent in the year to August vs the same period in 2025, and up 250 per cent vs the same period in 2024.” If a parent or guardian put in £2,880 per year to a junior SIPP, the 20 per cent basic-rate tax relief top-up means the total contribution will amount to £3,600. While their late fifties might seem a long way away, it will come round soon enough. I am 46 in under two months and yet it only feels like the other day when I was 19. I’d love to have a lump sum in 11 years’ time (call it a thank you for raising all those children). Morrissey says there are other benefits that aren’t purely financial. “A junior SIPP is the gift that just keeps giving. As well as giving a child a serious head start on their retirement savings, they also get an early lesson in the power of long-term investing. Along the way, it can be a great tool for teaching children important lessons about the ups and downs of the stock market, such as the value of patience in building wealth. It may even encourage them to start investing for other goals as they get older, perhaps through a stocks and shares ISA.” I will ensure that I repeat these words on Christmas morning when everyone opens their empty stockings and hope that it doesn’t ruin the festive mood entirely.