I fled Gaza for the UK – I fear my family will never join me

When Shahd* finally made it to the UK after fleeing the war in Gaza, she had her sights set on settling down, getting a job and making a life here with her husband and two children. But since the Refugee Family Reunion scheme was suspended by the Home Office last year, 36-year-old Shahd and thousands of others like her have been unable even to start the process of applying for their spouses and children to join them in the UK. She and her family fled Gaza in February 2024, when their children were starving. By then, they had 12 family members living in one room, and she recalls paying $20 (£15) for an apple at the market, which they had to try to split evenly among them. Shahd described their life in war-torn Gaza as “hell, literally hell on earth” by the time they left. Shahd and her husband escaped with their son and daughter, both under 16, to a country where at least they could find food and a reprieve from the bombing. But after their ordeal, even relative safety could not offer the family a reasonable future. “In the country we fled to, it was not very good because it’s very hard to get a residency there. You’re staying there illegally,” Shahd said. “At the end, you don’t have rights. For example, our children there cannot go to school. You can’t open a bank account. You can’t even register a SIM card under your name because you don’t have a legal status.” Fleeing to the UK Shahd had a visa to come to the UK temporarily for the graduation of her online Master’s degree and in November last year, she used it to come here and claim asylum, thinking that she and her family could build their lives in safety here. She said: “I had these great hopes that I would be able to rebuild my life in a new place that looks at me as a human being.” While she is grateful to the Home Office for approving her asylum application, she said being separated from her children is extremely painful and her occasional visits back to see them are not enough – she dreams of all four members living under one roof again. Shahd and her family fled Gaza in February 2024 when their children were starving (Photo: Mohammed Abed/AFP) The Refugee Family Reunion scheme ended last September, with an indication that the suspension would last only until spring. But applications have not restarted and no new route has been announced to replace it. Refugees have been left in the dark about when they might be able to apply for their immediate family members to join them in the UK. According to the Refugee Council, an estimated 16,300 refugees lack the right to apply for their families to join them, including people like Shahd. The pain of leaving your children Being separated from her children is like torture for the 36-year-old, who says they have been traumatized by the loss of family members in Gaza, which means “it’s very hard for my children to be sensing that there may be a moment where they might lose me or I might lose them”. She said it is painful having to tell them: “I’m sorry, I need to leave, because this is the best for all of us, and I will be looking for a better future for all of you. “And then my son just asks, ‘When are you going to be able to take us?’ And I don’t have an answer. I don’t really know if there will be any day that we will be together like the old days. It adds another burden for me. Especially as a mother and as someone who lost everything, looking back and having to start over alone, it’s not easy at all.” She does not know what to tell her desperate children, because there has been no indication of what a new system might look like, or when an application route might be announced. The Home Office has said the immigration and rights bill, currently at committee stage in the House of Commons, will contain stricter criteria for family reunions. A Home Office spokesperson said: “Under this government’s reforms to create a fairer asylum system, family reunion will no longer be automatic. Those seeking to bring family members to the UK will need to meet stricter criteria.” Shahd wants to prepare for the application but she can’t do this until she knows what a new system might look like. She now fears the criteria may be so strict that the family might not be able to satisfy all of the requirements. Refugees now face restrictions to other migrants hoping to come to the UK, including having a salary of £29,000, providing suitable accommodation, while their family member may need to demonstrate a basic level of English. The government made the decision due to rising tensions over migration figures with Yvette Cooper, who was Home Secretary at the time, saying the rules “were designed many years ago to help families separated by war, conflict and persecution” but are now out of kilter. Yvette Cooper was the Home Secretary at the time when the scheme was closed(Photo by Toby Shepheard / AFP via Getty Images) ‘We haven’t been given an opportunity to start a life as a family’ Since coming to the UK, Shahd has spent her days applying to jobs and attending interviews, hopeful she will soon secure a role here. She said: “We have this vision for our life that we want to contribute and we want to integrate in the society and be part of it. It’s just that we’re not given the opportunity.” Imran Hussain, Director of External Affairs at the Refugee Council, said: “The Government should urgently restore refugee family reunion alongside expanding new safe routes, so families can find safety together, rebuild their lives, integrate and play their part in Britain.” For Shahd, the distress of being separated from her family and frustration of not knowing when, if ever, they could be reunited, adds to the emotional toll. “So many people believe that refugees want to be refugees, but it’s not true. For me, I did not choose to become a refugee. And I kept delaying this option until I had no other choice, until I’ve lost everything, literally. “I’ve lost my home, my job, my security, anything that could consider me as a human being. I was literally nothing.” Their traumatizing experience has left her with “the feeling that we belong together and we want to be together and live together”. January’s immigration white paper stated the government would set out a new family policy, including for refugees, by the end of the year. A spokesperson for the Home Office said: “The Immigration and Asylum Bill will reform human rights laws to preserve protection for those in need, while bearing down on abuse of the asylum system. “We have also recently announced that the rollout of new safe and legal routes for refugees will begin in the autumn.” *Shahd asked to not to use her surname due to privacy