Husband coping better in the heat than you? This is why

It’s 6am and I’m lying stuck to the sheets, brain foggy and trying to muster the energy to haul myself to the bathroom after another sleepless night, wondering how many more weeks it’ll be before fans come back in stock. There’s a half-defrosted water bottle lying in bed beside me – the latest 2am addition to what can only be described as a military heatwave operation involving electrolyte tablets, frozen flannels and multiple cold showers a day. I catch my face in the mirror, puffy after several weeks of little-to-no sleep and a much-reduced exercise routine, while my boyfriend announces he’s off on a 10k run. He had three pints last night and it’s already 26°C outside, but he seems unperturbed. The other day, as my make-up slowly slid off my face on our way to a wedding, he told me he’d actually found the 35°C days quite pleasant. I arrived at the ceremony a sweaty mess, irritable and dizzy from the Tube journey, and joined a queue of fellow female guests rearranging our strapless bras next to the air conditioning unit while our male partners headed for the bar. Shorts I remember looking at them in their suits, chatting about work and the stag do, and wondering what it must be like to have ridden a mode of transport hotter than the legal limit for cattle and still look crisp. Are they living through the same heatwave as us? It turns out maybe not – and there’s a scientific explanation behind it, much to the relief of my girl groups, who’ve spent the last few weeks exchanging stories of our husbands and boyfriends going about their days as normal and sleeping under duvets while we panic-buy neck fans and melt into our seats. One friend says she’s booked a holiday in Greece just so she can lie in the air-con. Another has convinced her husband to spend their summer holiday in the Outer Hebrides because she couldn’t face paying to be somewhere even hotter. The explanation is partly to do with women’s hormone levels and partly our body’s response to heat, research suggests. According to a 2025 study published in the journal Building and Environment, women produce less sweat and start sweating at a higher temperature, meaning women can retain more heat before the body begins cooling itself efficiently. The same study found that women generally have a higher body fat percentage than men and, during parts of the menstrual cycle, a slightly higher core body temperature, providing an additional insulating layer – a frustrating biological reality many women have probably cursed while pulling anti-chafing shorts under a dress. On top of that, the fluctuation of women’s hormones apparently puts our brain’s temperature regulation systems “out of kilter”, says NHS GP Dr Nighat Arif, who calls heatwaves a “stress-test” for women’s cardiovascular systems. In other words, if you think the heatwave is bad, try experiencing it in the days before your period, when rising progesterone pushes your body’s thermostat up another notch. “After ovulation, our temperature will go up by a few points of a degree,” says Dr Nikki Ramskill, a GP specialising in women’s health. This might not sound like much, but it affects your overall resilience. “If you’re naturally hotter anyway, anything that makes you feel hotter is going to disrupt that balance. Things you might be able to tolerate normally – a cup of tea, eating something spicy – can suddenly throw your temperature off because you’ve got less resilience.” It’s little wonder, then, that heatwaves hit women harder than men – and that’s for those who aren’t then also going through major hormonal shifts such as pregnancy, the menopause or perimenopause. Painful hormonal conditions such PMOS, endometriosis and adenomyosis, which I have, can lower women’s resilience to heatwaves, too. “All these conditions affect our ability to cope with things in general,” says Ramskill. “If we don’t sleep very well because we’re in pain, that’s not going to make us feel good or cope well in the heat the next day.” Perhaps this explains why, while I was debating whether I could face walking to the gym for a gentle weights session, my boyfriend was logging another long outdoor run. Katie with her boyfriend. She wonders whether men are living through the same heatwave as women Modern life doesn’t help in heatwaves, either, says Geraldine Joaquim, a wellness coach specialising in women’s health. “These days we live in a constant state of chronic stress, giving us this drip-feed of cortisol. That’s going to raise our temperature as well because everything’s having to work a bit harder,” she says. Stress levels vary by individual but for many women there can be added contributors: first, the stress of having to plan for and adapt to a 28-day cycle and an ever-changing body. “Whether you’re not wanting babies, wanting babies, whether you’re post having babies – women have to be a lot more aware of our bodies than men,” says Joaquim. Then there is the societal pressure for women to stay quiet about their bodies. “That old adage that men sweat and horses sweat but ladies perspire; that women should just glow through life – it all adds to a feeling that women should be embarrassed if they’re red or sweating. Embarrassment is a type of stress, too,” she adds. Is there a way around the whole thing, then? Unfortunately, there is no silver bullet or one-size-fits-all solution, says Ramskill. Standard short-term cooling hacks can help – keeping a cloth in the freezer; investing in bedding designed for cooling; taking a frozen water bottle to bed. Joaquim tells all her clients the most dangerous word is “should”. Heatwave fashion advice is all very well, but what actually feels good on your body in the heat? And should you really go on that run on a 35°C day just because your male partner smashed out a 10k before work this morning? Not if that run will only be adding to an already-stressed body. “You’re not going to lose your fitness overnight. Instead of going for a run, bring it indoors and do some yoga or weight work – get yourself into some kind of holding pattern so you’ve still maintained a routine and are ready to run again when it cools down.” More important than any of this advice, however, is to keep talking about it. “The more you bottle things up and tell yourself you’re not going to sweat today, the more stressed you’re going to add to your body because you’re hiding part of yourself,” says Joaquim. “Hearing other people’s stories is very validating, and talking about it – ideally in a light-hearted way – relieves a little bit of that stress.” In other words, next time your boyfriend announces he’s actually quite enjoying this weather, resist the urge to lob your frozen water bottle at him and laugh about it. And keep sending those neck fan memes to your girl friends on WhatsApp. It might just help to cool you down.