How this common Christmas tree mistake, while it may seem harmless, could damage your child's self-esteem

One mistake that parents commonly make around the festive season could be damaging their child's self-esteem, according to a leading child psychologist. It may seem innocent - and many are guilty of it - to move a wonky bauble or replace a lopsided angel once the kids have gone to bed.But experts are warning that secretly 'fixing' your child's Christmas decorations - which might have been put up wonkily or in the wrong place - can harm their ego. Becky Spelman, a leading child psychologist in the UK, is warning parents against changing their children's messy Christmas tree, as new research reveals three in ten admit doing it. Dr Spelman said that repeatedly correcting children's art or creations could leave them feeling their efforts simply aren't good enough. With millions of families preparing to decorate their Christmas trees soon, she is urging parents to embrace the imperfections rather than chase Instagram perfection. Dr Spelman, Clinical Director at The Private Therapy Clinic, said: 'For children, decorating the Christmas tree is about imagination, self-expression and feeling they've contributed to something special. Perfection doesn't really come into it.'When a child proudly hangs a homemade decoration, they're sharing a little piece of themselves. Seeing it stay on the tree shows them their effort has been noticed and that they have a place in the family's traditions. The Christmas tree is the centrepiece of many family's festive decorations, but it could be the cause of harm to children if mishandled by parents according to experts 'That kind of creative freedom can help them feel more willing to have a go at things, even when the result isn't perfect.' Her warning came after a nationwide study of 2,000 parents, commissioned by Crayola, revealed that three in ten secretly redecorate the tree once their children are in bed. Almost half admitted moving baubles their children had lovingly hung, while 15 per cent have removed decorations altogether because they spoiled the look.From glitter-covered toilet rolls to five baubles crammed onto one branch, it seems children's festive creativity isn't always appreciated.A quarter insisted on a strict colour scheme, while 27 per cent of parents wanted evenly spaced decorations and 18 per cent have banned tinsel.Meanwhile, 35 per cent consider baubles clustered on one branch a decorating crime, while 21 per cent said they can't bear a wonky star or angel.Social media is believed to be the factor making matters worse, with two thirds admitting to feeling pressure to create a picture-perfect tree. A quarter said they rearrange decorations before taking photos and 21 per cent hid the messy side.Dr Spelman added: 'Wanting a tree that looks lovely is completely understandable, and moving the odd bauble doesn't make anyone a bad parent. 'But it's the bigger pattern that matters, and if children regularly see their creations quietly fixed or moved out of sight, some may start to feel their efforts aren't good enough.'Giving them their own branch, or a small tree to decorate however they like, can be a good middle ground.'Parents might see five baubles hanging from the same branch or a lopsided angel, but children see something they've made themselves.'Those imperfect decorations often become the ones a family treasures most, because they hold a memory of who that child was at that age.'But not every parent is as strict when it comes to the Christmas tree. Almost half proudly display their children's homemade decorations, while 33 per cent believe their children make more special decorations than expensive shop-bought ones.And 41 per cent believe a Christmas tree should tell a family's story.One in five have kept childhood creations for over ten years, while 15 per cent have saved every single one.For 34 per cent, it's about encouraging creativity, 36 per cent say they treasure the memories and 32 per cent love spending quality time making decorations together.Meanwhile, 31 per cent believe trees should be fun rather than fashionable, and 33 per cent think children should be allowed to decorate however they like. The findings were based on a nationally representative online survey of 2,000 parents conducted for Crayola by Perspectus Global in October 2026.