How I went from being lonely to making friends daily (and you can too)

There is a viral video on social media of content creator Jess Dawson asking a stranger whether she wants to be her friend after a short smattering of small talk. “There are so many comments saying: ‘Waiting for this to happen to me’ or ‘Waiting for an extrovert to adopt me,’” Dawson tells me. “And it’s like: you’ve missed the entire point of the video! “We can’t keep waiting for someone to approach us,” she says. “We have to just go out and do it ourselves. I don’t want to be too dramatic but we are living in what appears to be the most connected time we’ve ever had, yet we are the most isolated and lonely. One in six people globally are lonely. It’s a health crisis – it’s political – and we need to be proactive.” Talking to Dawson is a galvanising experience, so it is no surprise that her videos have resonated around the world. The 31-year-old’s attempts to make friends with strangers and normalise “yapping” in an effort to improve human interactions and wellbeing have attracted more than 150,000 followers across social media. A typical post has her filming herself attempting to initiate conversation with a stranger and then sharing this on social media. Shorts Dawson’s mission to connect with strangers officially began on social media in 2025 but dates back far longer. “I think I’ve truly felt lonely my whole life and I’m someone who has dealt with lots of mental health issues,” she tells me. “It reached a point about five years ago where I had to make a choice of giving up on existence because I was so unhappy or starting to curate a world I wanted to live in. My content is really a representation of that.” On 1 December 2025, Dawson posted a video titled: “Day One of Making a New Friend Every Day”. The accompanying text read: “Starting a thing where I try and chat shite to strangers every single day”. “I was going to be doing Christmas alone – I don’t have a family unit,” she explains, “and creating content was a way to distract myself from this fact and a way to maybe give hope to other people who weren’t in a good place.” Judging by the comments below her posts, I am just one of hundreds of thousands of followers from around the world to have been affected by Dawson’s content. Some talk of how they, too, are attempting to speak to “random people” on public transport or while out and about. Another simply states that she is “changing the world”. How does it feel to read such comments? “I get imposter syndrome – it isn’t that revolutionary,” she says. “But it’s also a responsibility I take very seriously as I get messages from people who are in a really bad space but have found hope through my content. That’s quite heavy and it can feel overwhelming.” Jess is enjoying her social life Dawson’s followers frequently speak about their desire to be as confident as her – a descriptor she finds frustrating. “My anxiety is still very present,” she says. “Quite frankly, I think I will live a life of anxiety – I just have to manage it. Going to the ‘social gym’ every single day is a good start; I speak to a new person every day because if I don’t, I get into a tricky place. “Isolation is a very easy coping mechanism for me, but it’s also a very unhealthy one. So, I have to be radically different, because I know that I get very unwell if not. “When people say it’s because I’m confident or an extrovert, it almost takes away the hard work I’ve done to get to this place. It also removes the possibility that they could also do this. I’ve had periods in my life where if someone spoke to me, I would literally burst into tears.” She cites a “greater ease with self” alongside “professional help and introspection” as enabling her to interact with her environment in a more positive way. While Dawson started out “trying to make one new friend a day”, her content has now extended to “yapping” with strangers. “I want to inspire other people to just talk to strangers and enjoy these microinteractions – they’re just as meaningful as the bigger interactions.” Start a conversation with someone you don’t know (Photo: Akio Maeshima/Getty) Doing so in a busy city like London often means offering to take someone’s photograph or complimenting them on their outfit as an ice-breaker. She notes the human tendency to “let fear dictate so much of our potential friendships” and says: “I think a lot of people think it’s quite a scary thing to meet up with a stranger. We need to give as much energy to platonic dating as we do to romantic dating.” Amongst the many interactions she has had with strangers, one particular exchange restored her faith in people. “I met John in Rotherhithe last summer – he was the first person I ever filmed with,” she recalls. “I was scared and had already been rejected by several people, but I persevered with John and we ended up talking for about 45 minutes. We spoke about both being in a spot in life where we felt stuck and trying to figure out where we needed to go next. But more than giving practical help, we were just being very kind – we almost reflected our warmth back to each other. And I realised that I can and should speak to strangers – and also not to be thrown off if someone doesn’t immediately look engaged. Dawson’s attitude towards other people has been transformed by the challenge. “I used to be very fearful of people and mistrustful of their actions and intentions – especially in London, which is routinely called the unfriendliest city in the world,” she begins. “But my view on strangers and, therefore, the world, has dramatically changed because I truly believe there are more people who are good, than who are not.” Jess doesn’t like the word stranger She continues: “Even the word ‘stranger’ is quite a hostile word. It almost makes humans ‘other’, when we’re all just fellow beings existing at the same time on the same planet. I see human beings as just people I haven’t spoken to yet. “I don’t wake up with dread very often these days, which is something I was very familiar with. Now, I wake up and anticipate magic – and I find that exciting. It’s not some fairy dust crap – it’s real. People are out that bloody door.” I joke that the new government should recruit her as their new loneliness tsar, such is her enthusiasm. “Sign me up!” Although her invitation to Whitehall is yet to arrive, she has grand ambitions, starting with a London-based WhatsApp group for people to meet and connect. “The next big step is much more in-person meetings. I have enormous plans for connecting people on a global scale. I know that sounds ‘woo-woo’ – but this is so much bigger than me.” Jess’s tips for better connections Don’t overcomplicate it “It can be hard to break the silence, but it doesn’t need to be complicated, witty or even particularly interesting. Brits love an observatory comment – ‘It’s a bit windy today!’ And I don’t think we should judge ourselves for coming up with a crap icebreaker as this can get you quite quickly into a lovely conversation. Overthinking is our worst enemy: both what we say and how we think someone will react.” Start immersing yourself in the world again “Take off your noise-cancelling headphones, stop wearing your blackout sunglasses and start existing in the world again. I know people suffer with overstimulation – I suffer with overstimulation! – but it’s important. Wear sunglasses where people can see your eyes – I think eye contact is a primal need. And ease yourself in slowly, because if you go from noise-cancelling headphones and mirrored sunglasses to talking to strangers, it might be a bit of a jump. Start interacting, listen to the noises around you and listen to people’s conversations.” Smile at people “Smiling at others is so underrated, especially in London. If I’m on the Tube, I will always try to make eye contact and smile. Once you break the ‘us and them’ complex and start showing warmth, you’ll be surprised how many people smile back.”