Donald Trump, Poet Extraordinaire

Editor’s note: Commentators are expressing concern about a Time cover story by Eric Cortellessa in which our commander in chief’s mind appears to wander. Maybe, they’re saying, the old bird is losing his marbles. But we’ve been through this before. What Trump Derangement Syndrome–addled philistines fail to grasp is that our president is a poet. As Trump explained two years ago, he applies a rhetorical technique called “the weave,” about which “friends of mine that are, like English professors, they say, ‘It’s the most brilliant thing I’ve ever seen.’” In October 2024, we published a digital chapbook of these Trump weavings as found verse, drawing from the campaign trail. Here we publish a sequel, drawing this time from the Time transcript.MSDNC I do respect the free pressBut I don’t respect fake news.I’ll give you an example.CNN and MSDNC—Which is MS NOW—They changed the name because it does so poorly. But I won the election. I won it handily By massive numbers. I won the popular vote. I won all seven swing states. They said if you won three swing states, I won all seven. I won the counties. It’s very important, 86 percent popular vote. Everything, and very conclusively, I haven’t had a good storyOn CNNFor years.Kaitlan Collins: A BlazonSo at a certain pointYou say,:“What’s the purpose of like this crazy Kaitlan Collins?” She’s a very average person. She’s the most unhappy young person I’ve ever seen. Saudi Arabia I’ve done a lot forSaudi Arabia. I protect Saudi Arabia. If I weren’t presidentSaudi Arabia Wouldn’t be here right now.Neither would Israel. They’d be wiped off the face of the planet. I do a lot for Saudi Arabia. My relationship with themIs very good. I like the crown prince. My relationshipIs very good. But remember:If I weren’t here, There wouldn’t be a Saudi Arabia.There wouldn’t be anIsrael.There wouldn’t beVarious other countries also. Song of HimselfI have the highest of IQs. I have the highest. I’m fine, and I understand that stuff. You know, my uncle was at MIT for 41 years,And you know, I’m a—I believe in genetics, franklyAnd I understand. I understand it much more than I thinkAny president would, because I do have An ability On this. I have an abilityOn those thingsThat were the new frontiers. What I’ve done is I’ve createdFor instance, these massive plants have no—We have no electricity in our grid. A Disgusting Mess I see the Secret Service lookingAnd I say:“What are you guys looking at?” “Sir, we think the Oval Office should be taken downAnd we’ll build a new one, sir.” I said: “My ass,You can’t build A new one. This is a special place.” The cabinet room too, which I also think—Show them the cabinet room when they go out, okay. The cabinet room’s gorgeous. That was a mess. It was a disgusting Mess. This whole place wasA disgusting messAnd nowIt’s perfect. Joe didn’t do it.