Australia’s Bondi beach hero says online abuse affected him more deeply than injuries: ‘I don’t get enough sleep’

Ahmed Al Ahmed, the man who risked his life to disarm one of the gunmen during the Bondi Beach shooting last year, says the emotional toll of the attack continues to haunt him. He has also said that painful memories from the attack and online abuse subsequently affected him more deeply than his physical injuries.Nearly a year after the massacre, the Australian father of two is still recovering from multiple gunshot wounds, with two bullets remaining lodged in his left arm. Speaking to A Current Affair on Nine Network, Ahmed recalled how he came across one of the gunmen on 14 December last year, while visiting Bondi Beach to get a coffee.Two attackers had opened fire at a Jewish Hanukkah celebration, killing 15 people. A 16th victim, a 90-year-old woman who was seriously injured during the Bondi Beach shooting, died in hospital recently.Eva Geller was ‌among dozens of people who were wounded when two gunmen opened fire on a crowd at the Jewish holiday celebration at the Sydney beach on 14 December last year.Mr Ahmed said he acted instinctively when he realised what was happening around him.“When I saw the terrorist, he came in front of me, and I didn’t think,” he told the programme.He described hearing people screaming and crying before deciding to intervene. “I said, ‘that’s it, I must stop him and do something’. I couldn’t handle the screaming and the crying.“I ask God to help me, here at the moment I find myself, I can do it, and then I ran to the danger.”Mr Ahmed said the encounter remains vividly etched in his memory, including the expression on the gunman’s face when he confronted him.“The terrorist ... his face, when I hit him … it’s evil, you know?” he said.“He thinks he’s a god and he can take anyone’s life.“And he looked to me and he [was] shocked.”Mr Ahmed was shot several times in the arm during the confrontation, as he attempted to stop the attacker from reaching more people. His actions were widely celebrated, with many crediting him with preventing further deaths.However, the recognition has not eased his sense of loss. Mr Ahmed said he continues to think about those who died and wishes he could have done more to protect them.“I wish I saved the people who lost their life,” he said.File. Belongings of members of the Jewish community are seen at the scene of a shooting at Bondi Beach in Sydney (AFP/Getty)The memories have affected his sleep, with Mr Ahmed revealing that he regularly struggles with nightmares.“I don’t get enough sleep,” he said.He also recalled how, while fighting for his life in hospital, he was unaware of the international attention surrounding his actions. Supporters had raised money through an online fundraising campaign, and he was presented with the money during his hospital stay.Although grateful for the generosity, the sudden public attention brought unexpected complications.As his story attracted worldwide coverage, Mr Ahmed’s private life also became the subject of intense scrutiny. Some of his family relationships deteriorated. Two of his brothers were charged with attempting to extort money from him, in a case that remains before the courts. His father also accused him of assault, although he subsequently withdrew the allegation.Mr Ahmed said the negative reactions and hostile remarks directed at him online had been particularly difficult to deal with.“It hurts, it hurts a lot and I think it’s hurt me more than the shooting,” he said.A fundraiser launched in the days after the shooting collected more than A$2.5m, about £1.24m, for Mr Ahmed, who was visited in hospital by Australian prime minister Anthony Albanese. Physically, his recovery remains incomplete. The bullets lodged in his left arm have not been removed, and he continues to experience pain, alongside restricted movement and reduced sensation.“The finger, I have a limited feeling, limited range of movement of the elbow and the hand, but [apart from that] I’m doing good,” he said.“But it’s still very painful.”